Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Sisters: You Love 'Em, You Hate 'Em

We all want what we can’t have. And when we finally get it, we aren’t always happy with it. When I was little, all I wanted were siblings. I didn’t necessarily care if they were older or younger; I just wanted someone to be around all of the time to play with.
I was an only child until I was about seven. Then I gained two older step sisters and when I was nine, I gained a little baby sister. “Gaining three sisters in a matter of two years?” This was astonishing to me; I went from being the only one worried about to having to wait in line. This was something new to me; I had never experienced anything like it before. I was excited to finally have someone to play with! However, I didn’t realize that having that much estrogen in the house all at once could also cause some issues.
My oldest step sister Nicole came to permanently live with us when she was fourteen and I was ten. Like any ten-year-old, I was always eager to know what was going on, when it was going on; I wanted to know every detail about everyone’s life at every moment of the day. My step sister (I will now start referring to her as my sister) was a moody teenager who wanted nothing to do with me or anyone else, besides her friends. This is when conflict started. We would constantly butt heads and she always found me annoying; the only reason I was annoying to her was because I didn’t know how to relate to her. We weren’t very close then because she was experiencing things I knew I wasn’t experiencing, let alone understand for years to come. Because she couldn’t talk to me about them, it put a barrier between us. This was hard for me because the sister I had always wanted was in the room next door, but I felt like I could never converse with her for the fear of feeling stupid or naïve.
Now that I am 17 and my sister is 21, we are able to relate to each other more. She can come to me with her problems because she knows that I will learn from them and that I will give her helpful advice. Although I may not truly understand what she is going through, I have a better mindset to try to piece together the helpful advice I may give her. I know that whenever I have a problem, I can always go to her because she has been through more things then I have and has lived through them. Being able to talk to someone about issues you know they experienced just makes me feel better and it reinforces that everything will be okay. Now that we have both grown up and matured, we are closer. We have become like real sisters. We joke around with each other, we fight, we nag, we do all of the sisterly activities. Growing up can really change a person and bring them closer together. With the transformation she and I have been through, that is really clear to me now. Although we may not have the same DNA, we are truly sisters.
Although having sisters may be tough, it is also a learning experience. People always say that you learn from your mistakes; however, having older sisters, you can learn from THEIR mistakes; I know my younger sister can learn from the mistakes that I have made by seeing them and learning from them. She will be a better person, just as I have been made a better person by watching my older sisters. The fighting and nagging may get tough but it is all worth in the end. Having someone there for you, someone who understands just what you are going through, and someone who can relate to you is just what everyone needs. Everyone needs an older sister to look up to, and I am glad that I have mine.

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